GO Why is "True" so hard to hang on to? At first glance true seems like it would be "easy-peasy-lemon-squeasy" like my 5-year-old always says. It is anything but. At least for this girl.
True isn't what stays in my head when I'm worn out. When I'm feeling extra defeated. When I'm plain old misunderstood. When I didn't get enough sleep because I stayed up too late writing.
"Lies" are what stays. They are like the film that rings the sink when the water from the dinner dishes has drained down. Lies are the residue that you hope the Mr. Clean magic eraser can remove from the shower door.
Lies are sticky though. Persistent. They don't come off without work. Without daily catching them and throwing them right out.
They stick because we remember. We remember what we think of ourselves in the quiet of our own heads. They are more memorable sometimes than the Truth in our inner monologue.
"You stink at this."
"You are a Bozo-and-a-half. And Bozos don't come in half sizes. You even messed that up."
"Do you think you might ever make a homemade meal again? Just wondering."
"You're a "writer." You think THEY want to read what YOU say? That's so...cute."
Caedmon's Call in their song, "Shifting Sand" talks about a yearning for more than their usual "15 minutes of faith." I am A-MA-ZING at being faithful for 15 minutes. It's really impressive actually. I can even stretch myself to 23 minutes of faith if I really focus.
The only thing is that you have to start the timer before anyone else in the house wakes up. When everything's going my way (i.e. it's quiet and still clean from the night before). When other people crash into my happy, however, that's when True steps out and Lies remain.
"You are the Worst. Mom. Ever. You might as well start a line item in the budget for their therapy bills."
"You really think eating that apple for breakfast makes you healthy? Please. You'll have a candy bar before lunch. Don't try to fight it."
I have found that the more I am in the Word looking for that ONE Truth to cling to for the day, it gets better.
And even a little better is fine. That's all any of us are really looking for. A small movement in the right direction. I have been reading She Reads Truth every morning lately.
It has helped me for two reasons:
- it is someone telling me what to read. Too much freedom and I'm in Psalm 23 everyday.
- It's just a few verses. Not overwhelming. But Truth. Truth to carry when the little ones wake up and need my assistance until they go to bed 13 hours later.
And you know what? True is getting more persistent.
True is starting to stick.
This was written in five minutes for Five Minute Friday over at Lisa-Jo Baker's place. Hundreds of people link up every Friday to write for five minutes about her one word prompt. You should totally check it out (or try your hand at it)! I would say that it's harder than it looks but I might just be worse than I seem. So I won't say it. It's easy-peasy-lemon-squeasy...
Thank you to those of you who participated in the fun
Sariko Designs giveaway this week! Here are the winners:
The Emily is not me by the way... It simply would not be classy to enter my own giveaway. I will be emailing both of you and getting you in touch with Sariko Designs. Congratulations!