GOI've been pondering how all of my choices either add to my life or they don't. They give wings or become anchors.
I know. It's not profound.
And yet, it has been for me lately. I have been mulling over and attempting to categorize ways I spend time, food I eat, activities I complete, activities I leave undone.
The thing that started all of this was an activity I was completing for a part-time job I have. A certain aspect of it completely zaps my energy. It doesn't even take that much time but it might as well take 16 hours because at the end of it, I am a zombie. It sucks the life out of me.
I started searching for more activities that drain rather than refresh. What else do I regularly do that ends up making me feel worse than I did when I started?
I'm not saying we only do activities we love. Pedicures and yoga all day. That's not real life. We have to do laundry and grocery shop. We must clip the fingernails of the masses and wipe noses to infinity. I'm speaking of the moments where we DO have choices. What are we choosing that is draining?
It didn't take long to realize that for me, right now, it's social media. In my gallant attempt at taking the blogging world by storm (and let me tell you, I have. It's reeling my friends...), I have been doing all the "right" things. Even as my twitter numbers and my Klout score increases (who even knows what that is?) I care less and less about any of it. I get closer and closer to being done with the whole writing situation. Life-draining.
"But we need to remember," she encouraged, "social media doesn't have a sin issue, we do."
I'm sure she said many other profound words. I was still back at that one statement though. The one that punched me in the stomach. I am the one with the issue here. It's not Facebook's fault. Sorry for blaming you, Mark.
I was just talking to my daughter today about how it's not right that the whole time she is having her special weekly day with Grandma, all she wants to do is watch television. Her grandma lets her because she's a grandma and that's what they do. It's not about her watching TV. It's not about if Grandma let's her. I couldn't care less. I am at Starbucks having a latte. My issue is the fixation on a life-less thing. Grandma might as well be on the moon for her "special day."
I LOVE the honesty of children. When I told her my TV concern and that grandma time was not actually meant to be a TV festival, her quick sincere reply, "Well, it's not my fault. She needs to hide the TV when I get there then."
Ah. So it's Grandma's fault. For not redecorating on a weekly basis...
Hilarious. Ridiculous. Convicting.
I, too, am desperate to blame someone else for choices I make that do not give life.
Join me. Inspect your choices. Not for the purpose of feeling badly, but in hopes of finding ways to fly instead of sink.
I'd sincerely love to hear what you find.
This was written in five minutes for Five Minute Friday over at Lisa-Jo Baker's place. Hundreds of people link up every Friday to write for five minutes about her one word prompt. You should try your hand at it!